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Kirk Cameron's D-list 'Groomergate' Homo-panic and Other Bummer News

Failed State Update for July 1, 2022
"Kirk Cameron in Hell" by DALL-E

"Kirk Cameron in Hell" by DALL-E

The failed state never stops failin’, which means we will always be in business — at least, as long as we can stand it. The truth is, reading the news this week was like staring into the abyss. And we’re not even talking about the Supreme Court run amok — you’re probably sick to death of hearing about that by now.

We’re really going to take advantage of the long weekend.

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You’d be crazy to let Kirk Cameron near your children

It’s hard to say if Kirk Cameron is the kind of bigot who sincerely hates queer people, or if his prejudice is tactical. (Probably both.)

As the actor recently stated in an interview with Fox News Digital, public education argues for a "far-left agenda" that includes critical race theory and "gender ideology." These buzzwords are, of course, meaningless in this context. But they excite and incite a certain demographic, which is great for the demagogues poised to take advantage of an increasingly radical right-wing base. And who knows? It might even help Cameron sell a few downloads of his new pseudo-documentary on homeschooling.

Groomergate — the notion that anyone, anywhere, who might differ in the least bit from conservative hetero norm is preying on your children right this minute, making them subhuman pedophiles worthy of extermination — is the end result of a long chain of modern media-driven moral panics that began with the Satanic Panic of the 1980s, then encompassed Pizzagate and QAnon in recent years.

The media played ball with the Satanic Panic conspiracy theorists in the 1980s (see also: Oprah and Geraldo) and it looks like the media in 2022 isn’t inclined to do anything different.

Wealthy serial sex pests headed to prison

In sharp contrast to all this “groomergate” nonsense, two legit, wealthy, celebrity sex traffickers — Ghislaine Maxwell and R. Kelly — were sentenced to 20 years and 30 years in prison this week. Seeing as how they both ran free for many, many years, enabled by their wealthy peers, before the law caught up to them, this isn’t exactly an unqualified victory for the forces of justice. But I guess we’ll take what we can get.

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For an exhaustive account of the Kelly affair, check out our interview with journalist Jim DeRogatis

Whitmer Kidnapping Suspects face new trial

Suspects in the Gretchen Whitmer kidnapping conspiracy will face a fresh trial, a judge said on Monday. Adam Fox and Barry Croft were among six men charged with a plan to take the Michigan Governor hostage and use violence to overthrow the government. Two other defendants, Brandon Caserta and Daniel Harris, were found not guilty back in April.

“We will need to have another jury weigh the evidence," Chief U.S. District Judge Robert Jonker said on Thursday. He also said that "a rational jury" would rule against Fox and Croft.

Since the 1980s, the militia movement has become a permanent fixture in Michigan, and with the rise of Trump and the COVID-19 pandemic, its influence has only grown. If the kidnapping suspects were going to go free anywhere, this would be the state.

For more on this story, read “A Tale of Two Michigan Militias” and “Prophets of (White) Rage” on Failed State Update


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Have a great weekend. If you don’t have time off of work, be sure to make your boss pay somehow.

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